Chloe met Kevin on Match.com a few months ago. She had seen his profile before, but thought he was a little out of her league. After all, he was a couple of years younger, an established oral surgeon in town and very attractive. Chloe never approached Kevin, so she was absolutely delighted when he emailed her. They exchanged a few emails, followed up by a few phone calls and finally decided to meet. The initial luncheon was fabulous, and so the their relationship begins.
The next month was incredible. Great dates, lots of laughs, all seemed perfect. Chloe began to notice that something was not quite perfect. She actually attempted to talk with Kevin. Of course, Kevin explained that all was fine and to just relax. This went on for another couple of weeks, then things seemed to change. Chloe could feel there was something different, he was withholding….Chloe eventually ended the relationship a few dates later.
Chloe approached me last week to relate this story. She definitely was not devastated, just perplexed. The relationship had not progressed, but she felt it had potential. Chloe was left wondering what exactly went wrong. We discussed relationships over martinis and agreed that we could not always find closure and sometimes it is just best to move on.
Even a large city can be a small town. Chloe ran into a mutual friend of Kevin’s yesterday and the friend was eager to shed light on Kevin’s issues. It seems that he has an on going history of 4-5 week relationships over the last ten years.
Chloe now has her closure, she no longer feels that it was something she said, didn’t say or did not do. She still maintains that Kevin is a really nice guy and is determined to remain friends. Chloe sincerely hopes that Kevin finds what he is looking for.
For me, I guess the moral of the story is that relationships are not easier just because we are older and wiser. No matter our age or our experience, relationships remain complicated, but I remain forever optimistic!